LASS_LESS.eng

If you were taken aback when the IITians unveiled their hornier side at an event in Mood Indigo ’05 , or probably raised an eyebrow on noticing the proximity among the VJTI guys making out together (the solution of a problem () or felt like a winner seeing a group of guys from VESIT dancing alone at the back, at a DJ nite…THEN LET ME OFFICIALLY WELCOME U TO THE WORLD OF ENGINEERING, MATE.

An average engineer while coping up with natural and self developed SEM-STRESS and the other ‘wannabe-corporate’- society activities tends to miss out on the “highs” and “lows” of life and literally so, given that the ‘chick-factor’ has been sucked out of their lives by dementors. Indeed, lack of ‘gals’ (u ought to get this 1 right!) has been topping the charts of ‘ Top 10 woes’ of engineers since ages. Even the forceful reservation for women ,which is highly resented by the guys during admissions just to repent later, by the government couldn’t raise fruit. But this ain’t the scene throughout. There are some colleges who enjoy the continuous ‘streaming ‘ of galz at an amazing rate of 5 kbps or more (kbps = kissed babes per sem; a unit of ‘flirt rate’ where kissed= met/bumped into (). Some of these dreamlands are TSEC, DJ Sanghvi, RGITand KJ Somaiya. When it comes to admissions , the folks avoid the ranks and convince their parents about their proved futility somehow and try their best to get into one of these; of course there are some who think otherwise (lets name them the “otherwise kinds”). As a result the asking rate , both scores and moolah have risen drastically in these colleges.

So now there are two possibilities : a) You get into a dreamland b)You are the otherwise kinds.

Case (a): A dream-lander finds himself oscillating between a fixed bandwidth, that varies with different colleges, with a continuously varying ‘flirt rate’ until he bumps into the ‘chosen one’ from whereon he attains saturation i.e. his ‘flirt rate’ exponentially decays to 0kbps. Many fall into saturation within 4 years of education , but those left out fly away for an MS. The majority here often exhibits an inclination towards management studies as they’ve managed a contrasting variety of things in life. Another characteristic feature of these dreamland colleges is an upbeat cultural fest. which has no relevance at all to their course.


Case (b) : The otherwise kinds who fall prey to the rankings and give into the luring institute brand value don’t have much to oscillate between as the bandwidths in these regions is pretty low. Some do saturate and most fly out. The interesting aspect about these, who form the majority, is the evolution of a varied species and a plethora of theories on topics like gals, relationships, virginity, life et all. The absence of gals in their lives gives rise to poets, painters, cartoonists, bloggers n writers (like me). The theories vary from mere classification (see box) to “words of weirdom” and from ace concepts like “a drink a day keeps the shrink away” to “fantasy in education” (Eg Rati AgNO3). Apart from getting into poetry n writing, there are other ways of getting rid of the lacklass ,like say organizing a fest and inviting non-engg colleges, busting into non-engg fests – especially the pronites where they could bump into gals just to exchange numbers n email ids. Most of them fly out or hunt in for an MS/MBA/Mtech and have a blast of a ball later.
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An IIT classification of gals / babes :

AA = Awesome n Amazing (imaginary/fictitious)
BB = Beauty n Brains (rare !)
CC = Cute Chick (the best bet)
DD = Damsel in Distress (avoid!)
EE = Exotic Eve (avoid if possible)

PS : AA to EE are grades in IIT
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All said and done, the next time u plan a visit to a non-dreamland engg. college or bump into an engineer at a pronite, plz remember ur ‘flirt rate’ and of course a fake email id !!